Yesterday marked the half-way point of my pregnancy and we decided to find out whether the baby is a boy or a girl. The surprise was fun the first time around but my husband, in particular, really wanted to know this time.
So I conceded and as it turned out, for me personally, finding out the sex yesterday was way more fun and exciting than learning after the pain and exhaustion of enduring labor when all you care is that the baby is out of you.
So yesterday was an exciting day – and we learned that we are having another little girl – and so far, she’s happy and healthy and growing right on track. All is well in this world.
What puzzles and INFURIATES me is the response of many people over the news. To me – it was the most exciting news – one that could just be met with a simple “Congratulations.”
I mean, not only am I familiar with girls but I have three sisters – I understand the intensity and role of the relationship of a sister in your life. Maybe it’s not always sunshine and roses but sisters have a strong bond. Sure, brothers do too – but if you think of all the families you know – I’m pretty sure you think of more sister relationships with strong friendships than you do brothers.
And so, as I spread the news, the reaction I received from many people was, frankly, sexist – was I going to keep trying until I have a boy, or ANOTHER girl? And the best one “Well, how did DH take the news?”
Excuse me, is this communist China? Do we shudder at girl children? Does having a son prove something that I don’t know about? Is there somewhere that says that boy children are what completes a family because he carries on the family name? Let’s not forget that those sons wouldn’t be carrying on any family names without our little girls.
Being one of four girls, my father heard this all too often, especially when my mom was pregnant with my younger sister and my parents found it to be beyond insulting, patronizing and obnoxious. I feel the same way. I have countless friends who only have sisters and they all are quick to relay stories of how much their parents despised being asked these same questions. Meanwhile, when I come across families with only boys – the reaction is always one of “Wow, they must keep you so busy with all the energy in that house.” Or “Wow – so many boys!” Or something along those lines.
All I care about is having a healthy baby – but trust me – I am THRILLED to be having another little girl and so is my DH.
For many reasons, we don’t plan to have any more children, so our family will be more than complete with our two little girls.