Hello dear fans –
This is: “Someone get me an IV filled with Xanax and pump it into my bloodstream ASAP” Kitty Time, reporting live from Washington.
Yes, you can all rest a bit and feel good knowing that Baptist Preacher Kitty Time is so dead to me today. Instead, I need that Xanax and I need it now. This could, quite possibly, be just another example of the Bush administration trying to control what is said and to keep women down because normally I would be blogging about Lewis “Loose Lips” Libby today. How brilliant and refreshing the guilty charges are, though I do feel a bit sorry for the guy. On the other hand, perhaps my love of country isn’t that deep because I can’t see myself being the fall guy for a President. I’d sing like a canary and leak like a boat faster than Britney’s first husband, Jason Alexander.
Alas, I will not delve further into that topic because there are bigger fish to fry in Kitty’s world.
Recall from last week’s drama of my first nanny quitting that I hired another nanny. Yes, well, she was supposed to start yesterday.
But she never showed.
And so, here we are, nanny-less and well, I am beat down. These past few weeks have really beat me down. Hell, I can’t even find the gumption to mock the President right now. Except my pathetic attempt to blame him.
I think I failed on this one. I think that I didn’t even listen to my own advice. I’m up here on my bloody pulpit spewing out all this advice meanwhile not even taking it myself. First of all, when the nanny showed up last week, I made a point to say my darling daughter’s name a few times and then a few minutes later, she asked me what her name is. I knew that was a red flag. But I chose to ignore it.
Secondly, when I called the nanny to offer her the job, it bothered me in a deep and profound way that she didn’t ask me how darling daughter was doing. She knew good and well that darling daughter was very sick and it really struck me as a big knock against her that she didn’t inquire to her new employer about the darling daughter’s health. Again, I chose to ignore it and chalk it up to nerves.
Third, the second guessing I was doing last week when receiving other emails from other prospective nannies (all of whom are now happily employed, by the way). That is very unlike me. I am not a doubter. I am someone who makes a decision, feels good about it and moves on.
And finally, the fact that I haven’t slept at all since our nanny quit, even after hiring new nanny, was another huge sign. And I chose to ignore it and reassure myself, very naively, that I was just being paranoid and anxious and it was fine.
So here we are, back to square one, only this time with a whole lot less energy and a whole lot more stress. My only coping mechanism right now is to put on my ruby red sparkly shoes, click my heels together and keep repeating over and over and over “This will all work out in the end. This will work out in the end.”
Oh, and you better believe, I have resumed complaining.